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Hectic dude … The last couple of months saw the whole frigging outhouse hitting the chopper blades, man. Carnage all over the place, with this Snorat character getting us into major kuck. I’d decided to grow my moustache hair before doing the sling-shot costume fitting at a shop in Voortrekker Road, and things got a bit out of hand when the shop assistant went all psycho. Said I reminded him of his sister in a Freddie Mercury sort of way, and do I want to call him Queenie.
It was about then that I decided to do a duck, but I can tell you streaking through ‘The Good-Hood’ in a dental floss-style garment makes for bad mojo confessed his undying love and a car-guard brandished his truncheon in a most unbecoming way. Round about now . Ford V8s were trying to run me down, a guy in pink cycling kit, and then things went a little hazy, and when I came to, I was sitting on Konstabel Griesel’s knee in the Goodwood Charge Office.
Everything is back to normal now. The charge of soliciting a police constable has been dropped, and I am back at NDORFIN HQ. The Shill and Crutinator still refuse to speak to me, and we are forced to communicate through a series of elaborate hand signals reminiscent of the All Black’s Haka. This, in a roundabout way, is why our newsletter did not appear for the past 3 months. But we’re back, and it’s all going down big time on www.ndorfin.co.za and www.duesouth.co.za
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The Secret is out. And it has nothing to do with visualising a luxury sports sedan or an extra couple of inches where it really counts. Instead, just plug into the NDORFIN WAY, and your dogma will never again savage your karma. We’re prepared to share our new age vision in exchange for tax-free donations, or you can just log into www.ndorfin.co.za for mahala / nada / niks.
What you will find is way better than the ramblings of some dodgy dude in robes. We’ve been cracking major time on the site, with most of the events now Google-mapped so you never have to get lost. Go to the event, scroll-down and the event is mapped down to the nearest metre!
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It came from the depths of the Indian Ocean. Shrivelled, salty and smelling of stale socks, it inspired fear amongst the inhabitants of a small coastal village. Even as we speak, The Crutinator will be trawling the streets of Knysna, preying on unwary revellers by sipping their beers while their backs are turned. There is no escape. Except if you enter any of the events listed below during the annual Knysna Oyster Festival. Be fit, or be very, very afraid.
Of special note is the Duesouth Xterra on Thursday 10th July, at the totally non-hideous PEZULA Private Estate. The perfect Xterra event for non-swimmers!
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You want to be first... Choose from a range of the Suunto T2, T4 and T6, all at 20% off while stocks last.
A sports laboratory on your wrist that will help you set your optimum training load and analyse every split second of it. Be sure to also look out for the new Suunto Tc series in select Duesouth stores.
Visit Duesouth online for more information and product shots. |
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I found myself at the Hangklip Hotel a few weekends ago. By chance, one of the AR community’s most eligible bachelors was supplementing his pay-check while engaged in rather dubious moves during an on-stage performance. Luckily, I had my camera with me. And now it’s your chance to win by writing a caption for the image below.
The winner scoops a Lowepro Fast-pack 250 (a super-functional camera/notebook bag) worth a cool R750 bucks, so get on it. Enter online here and we will announce the winner on www.ndorfin.co.za by mid-July.
Also, keep those browsers locked onto Ndorfin in July for the upcoming Duesouth online game! Navigate your way around an MTB course, post times, and race your mates, we'll keep you posted!
And now it is time to venture forth into this freezing frigging winter once more. Spare a thought for me as I brave the howling northwester, clad only in a bushy moustache and a slingshot costume, bringing cheer to adventurers, purple-rinse grannies and small furry animals all over the good old S of A.
Gotta go, Konstabel Griesel is waiting outside in his Cressida.
- The Ndorfinators.
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